Love and War
by nellchan0013
Summary: All she ever did was fall for the wrong person. But it felt so right, even when it seemed they were fighting one another. NxWhite, Fifth Generation Spoilers. Implied one-sided ChessShipping; T for safety; a bit dark...


I've been craving to write an NxWhite fic for a while.  
I see N as a person who's a bit crazy, dark, flirty, dangerous….insane? That's my perception of him, so this may be a bit dark.

Spoilers for Gen V game (which is so freaking fun to play, even if I can't understand it…)  
Oh and the Grass-Starter is being used because I've already used Pokabu enough times ^^

**Disclaimer: **As much as I wish, N, White, and Pokemon in general is not mine!

Love and War  
Love and War are so equally the same, but so radically different. The battles are different, the tactics the same. Anything goes, and anything will happen. In the end, the result is the same: no side will remain unchanged and no heart will go unbroken. Each of us has our own way of fighting, and each of us has our own price to pay.

"The rules of fair play do not apply in love and war."  
-John Lyly in 'Euphues' (1578)

* * *

The night air is calm, cool, and peaceful, allowing the Pokémon on the route a peaceful sleep as they rest for the next day. But not all the living creatures on this route are asleep; a Trainer has decided to camp out on this route for the night and she can do anything but sleep. Her mind is too focused on him, N. She thought she had him figured out, him and his mysterious encounters, but evidently she was wrong. White was still reeling from her encounter with him at Raimon City; it was too much for her to process at once.

Their encounter had just been like all the others; he'd 'bump' into her and they'd chat before battling. In almost all their fights (okay, in all of them), she'd one up-ed him and had beaten him. After her victory, they'd head to the Pokémon Center to drop off their team and then grab some food or some drinks and just talk. They'd discuss what they'd seen in the time they were apart and the battles they had participated in. White rather liked his company; even though she saw Cheren and Belle occasionally, and ran into Black often, they didn't give her the same feeling as she did with N. Besides, she felt intrusive around Cheren and Belle and with Black…well, he was her 'brother' of sorts, a friend she'd grown so used to having around. N was like a breath of fresh air.

And White had found herself inexplicably choking on that breath. Raimon City…that stupid Ferris wheel….Arceus, she felt so stupid! It wasn't he had asked her outright on a date, even though she had felt like it had been. Mew, why did she have to think of him that way? It had hurt so much more to find out he was against her, fighting for something she didn't think was right. Race her to be Champion? Yeah right. Stupid, stupid, stupid! He'd spun such an odd, but fascinating tale. She hung on to every single word, found every little detail about him, watched his emotions change and all of it…all of it made her heart beat for him all the faster.

White was crushed having to battle him immediately after their ride. Because it wasn't a 'battle' like they'd always had. This was a serious one, where she could see the determination in his face, one that said he was going to beat her for real, so that she could never stand tall again. But N hadn't noticed her own determination, fueled by a wide range of emotions so strong, that her team had managed to find the strength to beat him. This battle didn't feel good when she won; she'd beaten him like so many times before, but anytime after this…she knew would never be the same. They would never face each other as friends, but as enemies, working to keep the other from their goal.

But she would be Champion; and she wouldn't face him as her final rival, no, she couldn't even call him that anymore. Black would be her final obstacle for Champion and stopping N would only be part of that long journey. Or so that was the plan.

White sighed heavily, taking a seat on the grass she was standing on, pulling her legs to her chest as she let the heaviness of N's betrayal sink in. That was only a few days ago. To her, it feels like an eternity. She wants to call Black, but she doesn't know how to explain it….Belle would understand, but she can't bring herself to call her either and Cheren…well…she didn't think he'd be good in this type of situation. Instead, she is left to pour her heart out into the night, and to her Pokémon, all of who are awake and beside their Trainer. She thought she loved him, knows she still does, and hates herself for finding it too hard to change.

A breeze blows, stronger than the ones before it and still dressed in her travelling clothes, White shivers. She doesn't know if it's from the wind or from her own brokenness, but she doesn't care. So she's surprised when she feels a pair of strong arms wrap tightly around her and he rests his head on her shoulder, cap down so that it covers his emerald eyes. White doesn't know what to do, so she reacts instinctively and pushes him away, standing so fast, even a Ninjask would envy her speed. Her eyes are narrowed at him and her Pokémon stand before her, determined to protect her.

"What do you want?" The words come out harsher than she intends, but she doesn't care. Only part of her feels guilty. She takes a step back as he takes one forward and this pattern continues until she finds herself backed up against a tree. Her Pokémon are ready to attack, all they need is White's order and they can rid her of him.

But she can't; her mind is frozen at the way he looks at her, the way he walks deliberately towards her. His head is lowered slightly, but now, now she can see his emerald eyes so clearly in the moonlight, hurt, anger, and…something, some emotion she can't decipher. She drops her gaze, to where his hand is playing with that cube thing hanging off his jeans. In the back of her mind, she remembers he told her that it's called a Merger Sponge, something that's too complicated to actually think about (math isn't something she likes). But she remembers how much it piqued her interest, how it made her want to know more about him.

"White…" When he says her name, her breath catches in her throat. He's speaking in a low, seductive voice, knowing that the simple act of saying her name can catch her off guard. N is the siren that calls to her, the reason she will drown, no matter how much she denies that he affects her, he has her wrapped around his finger. He knows this and will use this to his advantage. "I only came here to talk."

She senses what he will ask next and she clenches her fist tightly. "Talk?" White repeats, more scornful then she intended. "I thought we were finished talking in Raimon City?" She chances a quick look at him and is more than hurt when she finds him smirking. Just when she is about to tell him off, his gaze intensifies and the negative emotions are replaced by amusement.

"We are far from being finished with 'talking'." He tells her, the implications all in that simple word. Chuckling softly, he flashes her a smile. "White, I'm not going to attack you, I'm not going to do anything harmful. Now, can you please recall your Pokémon before your Janoby slices me to pieces?" He asked her, eyeing the Grass-type with a small hint of fear.

Every rational part of White screams to not listen, and to, at least, keep Janoby out. Her oldest partner is looking at her with sharp red eyes, warning her to not fall prey to N. But no part of White is rational anymore, not since she's met N. He controls every part of her, and she can't do anything about it. One by one, she recalls her Pokémon, shaking slightly as she recalls Janoby, giving him a soft, "I'm sorry."

"That's better." He says softly, closing the distance between them. Another low chuckle escapes him when White attempts to back up further against the tree and he presses against her, his forearm pushed against the trunk of the tree, only slightly above her head, as his other hand tilts her face upwards. "You're refusing to look at me again; did I really hurt you that bad?"

He's right; she's avoiding looking at his eyes, afraid that those green orbs will encompass her very soul if he so tries. So she diverts her gaze down to his chest, where his necklace rests, refusing to think about the time she caught him without that white jacket on, making the contours of his torso visible due to his tight black sleeved shirt. Her blue eyes are almost cross-eyed at the motion, there being practically no distance between them.

"N, you've hurt Belle, Cheren and even Black; I think you know the answer to that question." She manages between a thick swallow. She conveniently leaves out the other crimes he's committed against her: heartbreak, thievery (on many different levels), and others.

N sighs, and she sees his shoulders slump as he brings his face mere centimeters from her. The distance is too hard to ignore and she makes the mistake of locking her ocean blue eyes with his emerald ones. She can distinguish different greens in his eyes; can decipher a range of many different emotions swirling within each other. And suddenly, she can't think anymore, can't remember why she is so mad at N, until he reminds her.

"I'll play along with this game, White. I never laid a finger on anyone of your friends, including that 'friend' of yours, Black." The way he enunciates her closest friend's name, White can't help but blush a deep red. N sounds bitterly angry and she knows all too well why. In some other universe, one without N, without Team Plasma, she and Black would be 'together' with a happy, steady, and most importantly, healthy relationship.

But this is her reality, heart captured by a man so twisted, she can't help but be drawn to him. This attraction between them is detrimental, and can't end in anything but heartbreak. But even so, White chose to pursue, as did he. Both knew what they were getting into.

"You indirectly did and that's enough." She hisses to him, refusing to let his word games creep into her mind. Despite how she feels about N, she can't let it slide that he's tried to take out those she cares deeply about, even if he didn't get his own hands dirty. He's twisting her words, and she hates that he can so easily. Fists clenched at her side, she turns away as he brings them closer and close together.

His lips are ghosting along her cheek, and she feels every movement his mouth makes as he says, "But is that enough to keep you away?" He drops the hand holding her chin and lets it fall slack against his waist as he waits for his words to process in her mind, to let his challenge be formally declared.

Nothing is working right in White's mind anymore. Her heart is beating at an alarming rate, her face heated in so many variations of red that even an artist's head would spin. Inside, her heart and soul are in conflict; she loves N, there is no denying that, but she hates him, another truth she can't deny. Their love, her love, is one large paradox, and she's slowly going insane by trying to figure it out.

Our heart wants want what the mind doesn't; our hearts appeal to our raw selves and we say things we don't' mean to. White found herself in this situation as she shakily turned to face N, his emerald orbs capturing her eyes in a mess of pure, raw emotion, with everything from hate, love, anger, jealously, lust, and a vast amount of others that she inhales sharply. Clearly, he is amused by her reaction and makes no move to break their eye contact, baring his soul to her through his eyes.

"Well?" His voice is but a whisper and she doesn't even know if he even prodded her with a question, her mind and heart a jumbled mess.

"No." That simple word has sealed her fate; she is and forever will, belonging to N. Nothing can keep her away from him, no action, no event, no person alive. She has let go of the person who has been there for Belle, Cheren, and, most importantly, Black. There is the White she is around them, and the White that N now controls. For so long their game of cat and mouse has persisted.

Tonight it ends. With a simple maneuver, N has trapped White and has used his control over her to his complete advantage. It's an underhanded way to win her, to convince her of what she has known for so long. It's unfair, it's sneaky, it's…so much like N.

"I thought so." N laughs curtly, bringing his lips to White's, surprising the girl in a demanding, forceful and too lusty kiss. He breaks away from her, leaving her breathless, and she slumps slightly against the tree, touching her fingers to her lips, trying not to let him know how much she wants to feel his lips against hers once more. But it's futile; N knows everything about her and every piece of information will be used against her to his full advantage.

With another quick kiss, this to tease her, N stands straight, a fox-like smile on his face. It is written on his face that White belongs to him, and that no words need to pass between them anymore. Raimon City was the first step, only a glimpse into what type of person White has fallen for. He's giving her an unspoken challenge and both of them are desperate to win.

"Until next time, White." And with that, N leaves her in her perplexed state, wondering how she went from hating him, to loving him, to hating him to where she is now. But she's going to take him on this challenge. She refuses to let him control her any longer and she knows N refuses to relinquish his hold on her.

All's fair in love and war, but White feels like she's going to lose this battle.

* * *

Well, that's that! Please review!  
I know the ending was a bit...off from the beginning, but  
I write what my muse tells me!

-nell  
(Oh, and if anyone is so interested, I've a challenge fic! PM or say in your review if you're interested!)


End file.
